In-Tune News You’ll Want To Use

Everyone who is anybody has a hobby or at least entertains the idea. Hobbies range from sports to crafts to reading and even traveling. Some hobbies don’t make sense to me like collecting dead insects.

My long established hobby has earned me a membership in the POP (People Observing People) Culture. The rules specify that each member must swear not to divulge anything observed.

Being a minister, I’m not allowed to swear, so I am exempted from this rule.

I love to get a nice hot cup of coffee, a local newspaper and situate myself where I can see the most people in their natural environment. Nothing is more hilarious than observing people who don’t realize they are being watched.

Don’t get me wrong here, I love people. All sorts of people. I would never unduly make fun of anyone well almost anyone. Everybody has something about him or her interesting and worth observing.

One of my favorite authors, F. W. Boreham, made this observation: Leave your house early in the morning and the first person you meet take him or her aside and write their biography. Of course, the person will not conceive anything interesting about his or her life, and that’s the way most people are. We think everybody else is more interesting than our life.

The average person, in my opinion, leads a more interesting life than almost all celebrities, except for Elvis who is more popular dead than alive.

As an expert in the POP Culture, the most interesting thing about people can be summed up in one word: mistakes.

Mistakes are the common characteristics of all those addicted to oxygen. Other similarities exist among people, but this one thing supercedes culture, time, age and gender. Everybody at some time to some degree makes mistakes.

Two kinds of people populate our planet: those who admit their mistakes and those who don’t.

Now, a mistake is not just a mistake. There are categories and degrees of mistakes. Let me list a few categories and see which one fits into your lifestyle.

The first category would be, inaccuracies. It is easy to get something wrong when dealing with numbers, especially dialing telephone numbers. Not long ago my wife, who works as my secretary, dialed a number for me. I can’t remember now who we were trying to call, but I do remember who we really got.

My wife dialed the number and as soon as it started to ring, she handed the phone to me. When I put the receiver to my ear, I heard a sultry voice invite me to do things I had never considered before in my life.

Her words sent shockwaves down to the soles of my feet and back to the top of my head, only to repeat the procedure several times. I had heard of such things but I never heard it personally.

I immediately scowled at my wife and demanded, “What number did you dial?”

“I dialed the number you gave me,” she said rather flippantly.

“Okay,” I quipped, “listen to this.”

I handed the telephone back to her and watched her eyes explode and her mouth drop open. She quickly gave it back to me, but I didn’t want it either.

Inadvertently, she had dialed some phone sex number. We both went to the restroom to wash out our ears.

Another category, omission. This is where I get into a lot of trouble with my wife. It is not that I’m negligent but I do have the odd moment where certain bits of information are temporarily obscure from any immediate recall. Like when I go to the grocery store for my wife and get everything but what she sent me for in the first place.

How this happens befoggles my mind.

Misunderstanding represents another category. I really do not understand this one. I have been accused of misunderstanding some very simple instructions from You Know Who.

I sincerely miss my understanding but for now, I’ll simply overlook it.

Blunder is still another category of mistakes. In this group, the mistake is rather innocent. It might be a result of some tiny oversight. After all, nobody can see and remember everything.

If there were awards for blunders, I would have a shelf full of trophies.

The list can go on and on. However, my experience as a card-carrying member of the POP Culture brings me to the conclusion that the quintessential mistake is the faux pas. If anyone knows about mistakes, it is the French. Just saying it gives one the feeling of something tremendously special.

A faux pas is simply a mistake in a tuxedo.

A faux pas can cover any and all mistakes. A simple procedure is associated with this. When you realize that you’ve just committed a faux pas, place three fingers from your right hand, never your left and never four fingers although two will work fine, across your mouth while extending your pinky. Then giggle and say, “Oh, pardon my faux pas.” Then roll your eyes upward.

This is most useful when in heavy traffic and you’ve just cut in front of another driver. Your faux pas gesture will be immediately acknowledged by the driver in the car extending a solitary digit upwards. This is merely a friendly gesture recognizing your faux pas.

Of course, the superb response to every mistake is found in the Bible. “Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.” (James 5:16 KJV.)

As someone once said, “confession is good for the soul.” Do a little soul-work this week.

Many a bettor has asked me “Why would I want a Full Tilt Poker rakeback? I just play at poker rooms when I have an inducement to clear.” What if one day you take the chance to become a full time poker better? There are too many card players who kick themselves for neglecting Full Tilt Poker rakeback however today the majority of them have opted in for all the major web based web sites.

Don’t turn into one of them. If you are a better that plays below a couple of dollars and just bets when clearing bonus payments, you are taking normally around one hundred percent rakeback considering the bonus on your wager. One major website recently removed bettors who used their poker web site entirely to play like this. Who knows if this might begin a new trend. Should this take place then a poker rake back is extremely critical.

Eventually you might just find your best game and become very successful, even if you aren’t already. I was hurt by an accident then internet poker came along when I was off work and I never looked back. That is a couple of years ago however I have not once needed to work in those couple of years due to web based poker and of course rake back. Thinking forwards is as ever a great plan. Regard it as an investment fund, even if you don’t believe rake back is suitable for you at present it could end up being an excellent strategy before long, there is no danger involved. Should you be considering signing up for any new poker room signing up for a rake back deal has to be a great idea. Rakeback Offers Rakeback Professionals is proud to provide such a lot of respected partners in the same place.

Getting the benefits can be as easy as visiting a The Rakeback Professionals agency partner internet site or as accessible as e-mailing. The partner will get everyone set up in no time. You can play directly. If you sign up with a partner thru Rakeback Professionals you can rest assured every affiliate will have been checked out and have agreed to permit The online poker players’ interest site Rakeback Professionals to arbitrate any conflict you might experience. Because we investigate our affiliates, we have had hardly any problems and we will invariably move instantly to look into every issue for the protection of all our gamblers.

Are you finding that your favorite jeans are feeling a bit tight? Notice a bit more spread around your mid-section? Welcome to middle age. If you are between the ages of 35-55 you’re probably going through the stage right before menopause known as peri-menopause.

This transitional stage is characterized by a decrease in the hormones that allow a woman to have a baby. As we move out of the reproductive phase of life we tend to gain weight. The weight gain of middle age is different from the way we may have gained weight before.

As younger women, we probably gained weight in the hips, butt, and thighs. The weight gain of middle age situates itself in the tummy area. And doctor’s have found that weight that is located the mid-section puts us at a greater risk for other diseases that tend to arrive with middle age.

Many women decide to do something about the gradual weight gain associated with middle age because of how they look, But there is an increased risk of both type-2 diabetes and heart disease for people who carry their excess weight in their midsection. There is general agreement among health care professionals that health risks increase as weight goes up.

Causes of weight gain in Middle age can include:

- Reduction in physical activity: Middle aged women tend to exercise less than younger women. This may be due to the multiple demands on their time. During this time of life women may find themselves responsible for both children, spouses and in many cases their aging parents. Sandwiched between competing responsibilities, a lot of middle aged women find that they have little time to really take good care of themselves. Sometimes an exercise program is among the first things that we give up when pressed for time.

- Overeating: Stress from the many demands of modern life cause a lot of women to seek solace in food. Without even noticing we can start to see food as a reward during times when we don’t have the time to seek rewards in more productive ways. Busy schedules cause us to skip meals and then we allow ourselves to get famished and eat the first thing that is available; often, over-processed, fattening fast food.

- Slower metabolism: As we age the number of calories needed to support our weight decreases. We can actually gain weight while virtually eating the same number of calories as we’ve always eaten. And the less active we are the fewer calories it takes to sustain our weight. Because muscle burns more calories than fat, people who are less active have less muscle mass and therefore need fewer calories to maintain their weight.

On the average women who are pre-menopausal gain an average of 1.5 lbs per year in the years leading up to menopause even without increasing their caloric intake.

How to lose weight. There are a few simple steps you can do that will, over time, cause a dramatic reduction in your weight. Of course before undertaking a major change in your diet or exercise level you should talk it over with your health care provider. - Increase your physical activity: Exercising regularly will help you to keep your weight under control. Exercise does so much for us health wise, in addition to making us feel good. Two types of exercise are needed to help control weight.

- Aerobic exercise increases your metabolic rate which means that your body will process the food you take in more efficiently. You can actually eat the same amount of food and lose weight. Aerobic exercise helps you burn fat as well, so your body will have more toned appearance.

- Strength training increases your muscle mass, and also raises your metabolism and strengthens your bones. Since our bones tend to weaken as we age strength training has brings added benefits to middle aged women in the form of protection against osteoporosis.

- Eat healthy: You may find that changing to a diet lower in fats and bad carbohydrates will help you lose weight. Good lean protein and fresh vegetables provide a solid base for a healthy body.

- The right supplements. If You experience the above symptoms look into supplements like Zalestra. Its maker claims it is a specifically formulated supplement for pre-menopausal women struggling with weight gain and changing hormones. Zalestra also purports to relieve menopausal symptoms, increases energy and enhances your mood. For more information on Zalestra go to http://www.bodestore.com/zalestra.html.

You met your wife in college, a busy time of studying, socializing and waking up to the reality of paying for the things your parents once paid for. On the dating end, you wanted to finalize your commitment to your future wife with a marriage proposal. The only problem is, you didn’t have much financial funds then to pay for an engagement ring.

So, you and your new fiancée settled on the idea that you would purchase a simple ring, nothing too fancy, or debt threatening, with the intent to buy her a better ring when you were financially able.

Ten years and a few kids later, you have finally reached that point. Upon your milestone anniversary, you have decided on a fitting gift that will fulfill your 10-year old promise. This year you will finally give her an anniversary ring.

But this is not just any ordinary ring. With an anniversary ring, you are complimenting the existing wedding band that your wife has worn for many years. It symbolizes commitment to your spouse, a partnership that has endured many trials, and a promising future of many years to come. Those aspects in marriage will make this anniversary ring a symbolic reflection of your unyielding commitment to each other. Accommodated with the new anniversary band, your wedding ring will now radiate with that extra sparkle.

What type of ring?

A typical “wedding ring” is that of an engagement ring, joined with a wedding band to complete the “wedding ring” set. Some women prefer that an engagement ring would settle in as the “wedding ring,” upon a bride’s wedding day. This could be as a result of simplicity’s sake for appearance or just to reduce costs. Other women like to keep with the tradition and be presented with an additional wedding band to accommodate her engagement ring on her wedding day.

With an anniversary ring, you can accommodate both situations. Should a wife have an engagement ring only as her wedding ring, you can finally give her that anniversary ring to join her wedding ring. If she already has both bands, then she could wear her anniversary ring on another hand. As the famous saying goes, “the more the merrier.”

Prices in anniversary rings vary between the low hundreds to the thousands, depending on design and the style. Hopefully you can give your spouse whatever they desire! Most importantly, the price of an anniversary should be insignificant. It is the thought and consideration of this milestone gift that will make it most special of all.

Heavy rains inundated New England, which experienced its worst flooding in decades.

The delicious saving grace is, the region, long known for its abundance of lobsters, found its dinner tables awash with them.

They owed the unexpected bounty to growing confusion about just where the ocean stops and the land starts.

“I’ve been a New Englander all my life,” a swarthy resident of Bangor, Maine, said, as he took another bite of the state’s famous delectation. “But I never thought I’d see that day that lobsters would show up for dinner of their own free will.”

The only frustration the diners, determined to make the most of things, dealt with is how to heat up the oven when the kitchen is underwater.

Tom Attea, humorist and creator of NewsLaugh.com, has had six shows produced Off-Broadway and has written comedy for TV. Critics have called his writing “”delightfully funny” and “witty” with “good, genuine laughs.”

If there should be one lasting message that we should learn from the current economic crisis , let it be that the health care industry in the United States is in need of help . Three of the most famous companies in our history, GM, Ford, and Chrysler, are on the verge of liquidation not because of stock market antics but rather because they can’t remain solvent while meeting their obligations towards their employees’ health insurance expenses .

In fact, for each auto that GM builds, over $2000 goes directly to the trust that the automakers have set up to deal with the ever-expanding expenses of providing health care to their employees , past and present . And you probably thought it was all about subprime loans .

As I write this, at the end of 2008 , the health care industry is the single biggest industry in our country’s economy, as measured as a percentage of the GDP , or Gross Domestic Product ; in fact, health care represents roughly 16% of our GDP, more than military , more than automotive, more than IT , more than any other industry you can think of. And it’s not close.

Any that will revolutionize health care must make an allowance for the development of new industry jobs, which will have an impact on the whole economy, as more folks who find themselves unemployed or under-employed at the moment can be retrained to work the good, lucrative health care jobs of tomorrow ; such action would have long-lasting impact not only on the whole economy and the individual people who will take on those lucrative positions , but also on the treasury and our nation’s budget , as those new jobs will bring in tax revenue that will help reduce our shocking deficit and lower the national debt.

And this is where universal health insurance comes into action . When you realize that over 46 million Americans lack health coverage of any type today, it is easy to see that by bringing these people into the system will only grow the scope of the health care industry, an industry which, as I pointed out earlier, is almost exclusively domestic. By giving these countless people a method to acquire their own health coverage , we can help expand those more lucrative positions , while improving the quality of life of those who are uninsured , and eliminating the wasteful expenses associated with caring for the ill indigent by hospital emergency rooms (the care providers of last resort for millions) and other wastefulness.

———-For more, visit Health Insurance In-depth

———-Jonathan Krakowski, the author, writes weekly for Life Insurance In-Depth and Auto Insurance In-Depth.

STEP #5

An expert is useless unless he or she is credible. Credibility comes through any number of ways, none of which actually have to be based on reality. Once again, perception is King.

You know, I once was an artist. Not just any kind of artist, but a real one. I was the kind of guy who labored 25 hours a day for three years to create something magnificent that I couldn’t sell for a frikkin’ penny. My parents kicked me out of the house and into the streets because they couldn’t stand to look at the damn thing. The art piece was based on a mirror.

But, like I said, I wasn’t a cheap substitute. I picked myself up and began the process again, this time with another art form. I was an artist, after all, and, really, neither the medium nor the money ever mattered as much as the fact that I was a “Principled Artist” and carried that sensibility into everything I did.

This went on for years and years. I received my sustenance through my ideals and values. I also learned the best mixtures of dry and wet cat foods to produce a flavor somewhat like chunky chili.

And then, I woke up.

I realized this whole aura of goodness and integrity and aesthetics and sacrifice that surrounds the artist was a total crock! I began to leave behind the haze of illusion surrounding the romance of the artistic life and got down to brass tacks.

“Life is money. Money is life. Screw satisfaction of Spirit. I want a Condo on Maui!” I called out on the first morning I was sober in perhaps six months. It was actually my third morning in jail but I guess it takes your body a little while to get purified.

Anyhow, in that moment I realized I could leap away from my old impoverished life into a new one filled with riches. It’s the experts that make all the money, and here I had discovered one of the most powerful steps to becoming successful as an expert, which, in my mind IS all about money:

STEP FIVE: HAVE A CONVERSION EXPERIENCE AS THE HUB OF YOUR AREA OF EXPERTISE

A “conversion experience?” you may ask. Well, since your question lives only in my head, I may as well answer it quickly so I can make room for the next voice.

Simply pick the area of your life in which you have the most experience. Now figure out what is the exact opposite of that way of life, or business, or being. There you have it. That is now a viable area of expertise for you.

Do you follow? Okay, I’ll explain, that’s my job, you know.

The conversion experience is about that moment when you realized your life was so vile that you vowed to devote the rest of your breathing days righting that wrong. As an expert, that is the most valuable commodity you have to sell because that passion makes you instantly believable. The inner voice of your target sounds something like this: “Who better to follow than someone who has lived the other side?”

We don’t have to go very far for one of the most potent examples of how this works. You may have heard of Paul of Tarsus. Saint Paul. He’s the guy who was the expert on Jesus. Without Paul, we’d ALL have stale Matzoh in our cupboards.

Everybody believed him — and not only during the time he was around, but for about a couple thousand — THOUSAND years — after.

Why? Because before he had his calling he was riding through the countryside exacting monetary tributes in the most violent ways, literally terrorizing the followers of Christ.

And then, one day he got struck from his horse by a bolt of light. He must have hit his head or something because from that day forward, every moment of his life was spent in opposition to the life he once had.

Do I have to say more?

Well, yes, actually because I’m the expert and that’s my job, too. Why am I getting through to you? Because I, who once was the artist espousing the value of poverty am now the expert urging you on to riches. I am the Anti-Paul. I’ve been there, done that, just like you, and now embody how you, too, can leave your past miserable Spirit-driven life and join me as an expert.

As long as you don’t be the expert on becoming the expert.

At this point you might be wondering why this Step wasn’t Step #1. After all, doesn’t it make sense to choose your area of expertise first?

To be perfectly honest, it probably does. But remember, I promised Ten Steps. I didn’t say anything about them being in a straight line. I would hope you’d have more faith in yourself in being able to piece this all together.

STEP SIX

Step #5 provides a very valuable hint about what it takes to be an expert. Passion. But there’s another force almost as powerful in the perception of your targets. It’s called Pity. As in, “Well, somebody’s gotta do it. Glad it’s not me.”

You see, experts do things that none of the rest of us really have the balls to do. (My apologies to the women out there, but I’m not too expert at finding better analogies than what I was taught in Brooklyn.) In our minds, they see things in the here and now that we couldn’t even imagine under the influence of 42,000 micrograms of Orange Sunshine. As such, they are the only ones qualified to take on these huge projects. Who else but an expert would do something so humongous? And dangerous.

The expert’s job has more to do with attitude than it has to do with almost anything else. (This, too should be a Step in itself, but I thought of it too late and I already published the title. Since I always completely forget about at least two steps of the Twelve Step Program at any one time, I figure, like me, you start zoning out, so I’ll slip it to you here.) The most important part of that attitude is that you don’t look like you have an attitude.

Yes, I know, that’s what you do now and nobody respects you as an expert, if for anything at all. You’re obviously doing it wrong. Now, you’d think I’d tell you how it works. I can’t. You have to figure it out yourself and make mistakes. What? Do you possibly think I’m going to do everything for you?

Try this: Next time you go into a Starbucks (TM, probably) don’t leave until you’ve managed to mention (something like) this to the Barista, AFTER you receive the most exotic roast they have: “I used to prefer this roast when grown at 11,000 feet. This couldn’t have been grown at more than maybe ten-five at the most, and I love it!”

If the Barista says anything to you beginning with or leading up to the words “Are you…” you’ve blown it. If the Barista says anything at all to you, you’ve blown it. People know an expert when they come across one and usually feel too inadequate to even follow through on a conversation, unless of course they are somewhat expert themselves in which case you should get out of the coffee shop as unobtrusively as possible.

Go from coffee shop to coffee shop until your target Barista gets you another cup of coffee of a different roast, for free, hands it to you and asks your opinion. When you can take a sip of that coffee and simply reply, “I like it” or, “Not my preference.” And then drop it completely without the need to explain yourself, AND the Barista asks you no more questions, then you have attained the attitude of an expert.

But, back to danger.

The experts you question least are usually the experts who are embarking on some sort of journey that may get them killed. Of course you pity the stupid fools. But bottom line, you’d rather see them die than you, and since you feel like such an idiot for not seeing what the expert sees, you’ll be happy to do anything you can to support them in their cockamamie quest - as long as you’re the one not catching the bullet.

STEP NUMBER 6: ALIGN YOURSELF WITH A CAUSE THAT COULD KILL YOU

Things like attaining world peace or ending hunger for children are prime examples of causes that are not adequate to the task of establishing yourself as an expert. They are far too doable. Perhaps even more important; they are far too clear and safe.

Slogging through Dengue Fever-ridden waterways into the deepest most inaccessible part of Mozambique to build a research-facility and hospital from the ground up that will be using you as a research subject in a study of the effects of the Coalanga spider whose bite can take down an elephant but when prepared properly also makes the lost tribe of the Queaxicles immune to hemorrhoids is just the sort of thing that an expert would pursue that none of us would ever undertake, but could clearly get behind. (Way behind!)

The glorious part about this step is that the expert does not even have to be an expert in any aspect of the cause that’s being adopted. All that has to be said is this amazing computer expert is putting all she has into the task, as a human being, because, in the end, that’s all we have. The “Everyman” factor alone flocks people to her. The operative concept, however, has to do with death. Whatever it is, the gamble must include the threat of it; directly or indirectly, physically or emotionally.

An impossible cause can be effective as well, but you have to be careful. There are a whole lot of unemployed experts on the Berlin Wall and the Irish/English Troubles running around out there.

Drew says, “I’m just a nuts and bolts kind of guy, checking out the angles like everyone else. I’m not much for slowing down because, well, they really will catch up with me. What keeps me going is the wonder of how amazing things come through people when they just go about the business of being themselves. I go to http://www.thestoryofthis.net for my inspiration.”

Wushu is a Chinese term which is basically built of two word combinations “wu” which refers to martial and “shu” which stands for arts, so it generally refers to any type of martial arts on the globe . Judo, Tae Kwon Do, Jeet Kune Do, Defendo, Krav Maga, Kombato and more. Unlike kung fu, the term wushu is topically dedicated to what it refers to, while kung fu on the other hand, literally means a skill, just any skill. For example you can say of a doctor or a teacher “he has a good kung fu” which means skill, if he is talented in his field, but you can’t say he has a good wushu. Though nowadays wushu refers to the recent sport, namely “wushu sport ” and also called “contemporary wushu ” or “modern wushu ” which was created by People’s Republic of China after 1949, which is a combination of traditional Chinese martial arts.

Wushu’s earlier development was to enhance the opportunity of living, like killing animals for food, combat against others, live tough situations and more. There are still a lot of wushu styles in china which can be generally divided into few branches in terms of geographical region and in terms of methods. Geographically, wushu is categorised as northern style wushu and southern style wushu which basically refers to Northern Shaolin temple and southern Shaolin temple, although in the modern meaning of wushu, the term encompasses any style that originates either from the south or the north. The basic difference between this two styles is that the southern wushu style emphasizes hand skills, tough arms and a steady, ingrained stance and footwork. However, the northern style focus more on jumps, kicks and rapid movements.

Some examples of the northern Chinese wushu styles include Changquan, Tanglangquan, Chuojiao, Bajiquan, Taijiquan, Baguazhang, Bayingquan, and Yingzhaoquan and some of the southern styles include Hung Gar, Wing Chun, and Choy Lay Fut.

In terms of methods, wushu can be divided into internal soft styles like Taijiquan which focus on the balance of body energies, control of movements and the concept of QI and External or hard styles which are topical fighting styles focusing on speed, strength, deep explosive power and vigor. External styles include all other types of Wushu, except for, Liu He Ba Fa, Baguazhang ,Xingyiquan, and Taijiquan.

Most of these styles and other Chinese martial arts have practical applications which are known as forms, or “taolu” in Chinese. Forms are series of techniques and movements which are to be performed alone or with one or more partners. This form is divided into two parts; forms that are performed by one parson and “sparring” forms which are performed by two or a group of people.

The other side of the training are “basics” which include exercises for strong and flexible muscles. such as various exercises for strengthening the body, and regular stretching for flexible muscles. Most of Chinese martial arts also uses weapon training normally chines traditional weapons like Changsuijian (Long-Tasseled Sword) Shuangshoujian (Two-Handed Sword) Jiujiebian (Nine Section Whip) Sanjiegun (Three Section Staff) Shengbiao (Rope Dart) Dadao (Great Sword) Pudao (Pu Sword) Emeici (Emei Daggers) Shuangdao (Double Broadsword) Shuangjian (Double Sword) Shuangbian (Double Nine Section Whips) Shuanggou (Double Hooksword).

Michael Russell
Your Independent guide to Martial Arts

Jewelry retailers across the country are gearing up for May 1, the official start of gold month 2006. Since 2004, jewelers have used May as a platform to reach customers considering purchases for Mother’s Day, graduation, first communion, confirmation and the bridal season. In addition to the gift-giving opportunities, the campaign is also designed to inspire self-purchase, encouraging customers to update their spring and summer wardrobe with new styles of gold jewelry.

Retailers should think beyond products when they are considering ways to attract new business during gold month 2006. Because the ‘May is Gold Month’ event is really still in its infancy, it is important to establish an in-store theme to inform customers of the occasion, and any promotions the store is running in conjunction.

Here are a few tips to consider when preparing to attract new business during gold month this year:

Tell the World: Use retail signs in and outside the jewelry store to advertise gold month to people passing by. If customers are out shopping for a unique gift, they will be more likely to visit your jewelry store if there’s a retail sign telling them about your promotion.

Show them What You’ve Got: Consider a specialty jewelry display case that showcases a wide array of items featured for gold month. A special display case will be beneficial well beyond a gold month promotion. It will allow your store to highlight hand picked products for special events throughout the year.

Send the Message Home: Reinforce the gold month theme by using all gold colored jewelry packaging in the month of May. Consider custom printed jewelry boxes, shopping bags and gift bags, as well as the packaging extras like ribbons and bows to keep your store and gold month fresh in the customer’s mind.

“May is Gold Month” is your opportunity to set your company aside and capitalize on a customer base that is ready to buy. Be at your best by creating an environment that brings them in and keeps them coming back throughout the year. For additional inspiring ideas and products for your jewelry store, visit
www.nu-era.com.

“May is Gold Month” is your opportunity to set your company aside and capitalize on a customer base that is ready to buy. Be at your best by creating an environment that brings them in and keeps them coming back throughout the year. For additional inspiring ideas and products for your jewelry store, visit
http://www.nu-era.com

Imagine my surprise when I went to Jamaica a few years ago and learned that I do, indeed, have an accent. You see, unlike my paternal grandmother, I don’t stretch the word “cornbread” into four syllables. She might say, “Here. Have ye some co-orn-bray-ed;” whereas I might say, “You want some corn-bread?” See? Two syllables on the cornbread; “you” rather than “ye.”

Unlike my maternal grandmother, I say “carrion” rather than “kyarn.” In fact, I had no idea what she was talking about until recently when I mentioned the word to my husband. I told him, “Grandmother used to say, ‘That stinks like kyarn.’ I never figured out what ‘kyarn’ was.” He said, “Road kill.” My jaw dropped. “You mean, carrion? Kyarn is carrion?” “Yeah,” he said. “Put the Appalachian accent to it.” It made sense.

Unlike my mother-in-law, I say “they fought,” not “they fit.”

Thus, I concluded that I have no accent. After all, I’m fairly well educated. I studied French for three years, and I did some self-study of German and Greek. Plus, I’m well read, and I’ve authored several books. Ain’t I the berries? I couldn’t possibly have a hillbilly, Appalachian accent. And, yet, in Jamaica, everyone I met asked, “What part of the South are you from?”

So, I did a little research and learned that the Appalachian region has its own language. Linguists call it “Appalachian English.” The Scots-Irish settled the entire region known as Appalachia (all of West Virginia and portions of Virginia, Pennsylvania, North Carolina, Kentucky, Tennessee and Georgia) in the mid-1700’s. At the time, physical boundaries kept modernization out. Then in the 1940’s, the Great Smoky Mountains National Park was created; and that brought tourists to the area. By the 1950’s, highways and telephones were more prevalent throughout Appalachia, bringing the modern world another step closer to its rural inhabitants.

Now, I don’t want you to think we in Appalachia are a bunch of snobs. We realize that the same immigrants who settled here settled land elsewhere, but the linguists tell us that our speech patterns will not be found in any other dialect to the extent that they are in Appalachia. In addition, we Appalachians use variants of our own speech patterns. Just because I don’t use the same words as my grandmothers doesn’t mean that I don’t have an Appalachian accent. In fact, the linguists say that each region has its own speech patterns and that most of us allow our situations to govern our speech. For example, when I’m talking with my family, I’m liable to let down my guard a littleuse a bit more Appalachian English and a bit less Standard American English. In a more formal situation, I’ll try to employ a lot less Appalachian English. Even though I know from personal experience that most Appalachians are not “dumb hillbillies,” I’m afraid that others might see me that way if I use the language I naturally use. And yet, some phonological differences are so inbred, that I can’t not use them.

Did you know that the t at the end of slept is not silent? You might say, “I slept in this morning.” I would say, “I slep in.” To me, that “t” just doesn’t feel right. It reminds me of an episode of “All in The Family” where Edith met a Jewish baker and he called her “Edit.” She told him, “My name’s Edith! Th!” So then he called her “Edit-th.” To me, “slep-t” would be every bit as awkward.

Do you say “exactly” or “exackly”? And how about ten? I’ve actually heard people say “ten” with a short e soundlike in the word “bed.” How weird is that? Tin and ten are words with the “exack” same sound but different meanings.

The linguists also point out some lexical differences in Appalachian English. For example, the Standard American English word might be faucet, but the Appalachian English version would be spigot. If somebody looks sick, we might say, “he’s peaked” (that’s peek-ed). Did you hurt your finger? Then we might say you “stoved it up.” I once knew a man who substituted “for” for “because.” He’d say, “I need to go to the store, for I’m out of milk.” My brother would substitute the entire remainder of our family with the word “nim.” He’d ask me, “Did Mama and nim go to the store?” Some people say “knowed” rather than “knew.” We’re famous for our double negatives. “I don’t have none of that.” Our present perfect tense has raised some eyebrows, too. “He’s done done it now!”

This little foray into my Appalachian heritage has given me new insight. We might chop off some of our “-ings”; we might “reckon” rather than “guess” sometimes; and we might have places with such outlandish names as “Lick Skillet,” “Frog Holler” and “Sugar Loaf,” but we have a rich history. We know where we came from and, for the most part, where we’re going. And if anyone thinks we’re a bunch of ignorant hillbillies, then you ought to come and get to know us a little better. If you stay long enough, we might be able to teach you how to talk right.

Gayle Trent’s latest book is a comedic mystery titled BETWEEN A CLUTCH AND A HARD PLACE. Find out more about the book at Gayle’s Web Page.